loneliness and young people

How to help young people who feel lonely

Loneliness in young people is a common emotional experience where a person feels disconnected from others, even when they are not alone. This guide is for family and explains what loneliness looks like and how to support a young person to feel more connected.

Adolescence is a period of significant change, including leaving school, starting work or study, shifts in friendships, or increased time online. It can also be influenced by experiences like bullying, family stress, cultural disconnection, or feeling different from peers. I, loneliness is a signal that a young person’s need for connection is not being met, and it can improve with the right support.

Family play an important role in helping young people navigate loneliness by recognising the signs, starting open conversations, and encouraging meaningful connections both within and outside the home.

What is loneliness in young people?

You might have heard the saying that you “can feel lonely even in a crowded room”. That’s because loneliness isn’t about how many people we’re surrounded by – it’s about how connected we feel to them. Loneliness is a common and human experience. Most people feel lonely at different points in their lives, especially during times of change or transition.

For people who’ve moved away from family and loved ones, loneliness can feel like missing home or being homesick. For others, loneliness might also show up as feeling disconnected from familiar traditions—like not hearing their language spoken, missing cultural celebrations, or struggling to find a sense of belonging in a new community.

Feeling lonely doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. It can help to think of loneliness as a signal – an uncomfortable feeling that tells us our need for connection isn’t being met. And importantly, loneliness isn’t permanent—it can change. With time, support, and connection, those feelings can shift.

Download our fact sheet on understanding loneliness

(PDF 554kb)

Common signs of loneliness

When we experience loneliness, it can start to shape the way we see ourselves and the world around us- like wearing a pair of glasses that make disconnection stand out more than connection. This can lead to changes in a young person’s thoughts and behaviour. People who feel lonely are more likely to be critical of themselves and expect rejection from others. You might notice a young person:

•    Avoiding social situations or isolating themselves
•    Spending more time online or gaming
•    Negative self talk – things like ‘they wouldn’t want me there anyway’ or ‘they won’t notice if I don’t go‘
•    Feeling dissatisfied with their relationships – young people experiencing loneliness might be more likely to believe that others don’t put as much effort into understanding or listening to them
•    Showing signs of anxiety or depression, like worrying more than usual or losing interest in hobbies
•    Feeling excluded or misunderstood – for example, if they feel unwelcome because of their background, culture, faith, or identity

Recognising these signs early can help you offer support sooner.

How to talk to a young person about loneliness

Loneliness can make it harder for young people to reach out, even when they want connection. Taking steps to rebuild and maintain connections can help. 

You can talk to them about:

•  how friendship changes over time – how it’s common and OK for them to ebb and flow, and how building new connections takes time.
•  how change and growth can be both difficult and an exciting part of life – and how it’s common for young people to feel distant from friends as they grow and change.
•  how people generally respond positively to reconnecting even if there hasn’t been contact in a while – if a young person has ‘lost touch’ with a friend they may feel hesitant about reaching out.

You can also support them to:

•    develop coping strategies – check out our 7 tips for a healthy headspace
•    express their feelings in a healthy way such as journalling, listening to music, or talking with a trusted person
•    gently encourage them to reflect on their experience of the breakdown, if appropriate. 

Looking after yourself

Supporting a young person through loneliness can feel challenging, and it’s important to care for your own wellbeing too. When you look after yourself, you’re better able to support them. Here are some ideas:

•    Stay connected – Make time for your own friendships, family, and community activities.

•    Set healthy boundaries – It’s okay to define what you can and can’t take on. Clear boundaries help prevent burnout and model healthy relationships for the young person.

•    Celebrate small wins – Acknowledge the small moments of connection or progress, both for the young person and for yourself.

•    Take breaks – It’s okay to step back and recharge when things feel overwhelming.

•    Talk it through – Share your feelings with someone you trust or seek professional support if you need it.

•    Practice self-care – Simple things like getting enough sleep, eating well, and doing activities you enjoy can make a big difference. Self-care can also include cultural or community practices that bring comfort and belonging—like cooking a traditional meal, attending a faith gathering, or spending time with relatives and community members.

•    Be kind to yourself – Supporting a young person isn’t always easy. Remind yourself you’re doing your best.
If you ever feel worried or unsure, reaching out for help is a sign of strength—not weakness. You don’t have to navigate this alone.  You can also find professional support through headspace, your GP, community organisations or other mental health services.

If you ever feel worried or unsure, reaching out for help is a sign of strength—not weakness. You don’t have to navigate this alone.  You can also find professional support through headspace, your GP, community organisations or other mental health services.

When to seek professional help

If you ever feel worried or unsure, reaching out for help is a sign of strength—not weakness. You don’t have to navigate this alone. You can also find professional support through headspace, your GP, community organisations or other mental health services.

The headspace Clinical Reference Group oversee and approve clinical resources made available on this website. 

Last reviewed 17th April 2026.

This content was developed in association with the Parenting Research Centre.