eheadspace Group Chat
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Group Chat
When and how to set boundaries?
November 2nd 2017 @ 12am AEDT
When your relationship with your young person is struggling and you’re also worried about their behaviour and/or mental health, what’s the best way to handle things?

Many adults supporting young people struggle when the situation is complex and the usual approaches don’t seem to be working. Often other adults are telling you it’s time for ‘tough love’ but you’re not sure.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:46 pm
eheadspaceMich: Hi everyone and welcome to our Group Chat session today for parents and other adults supporting young people!
Today we hope we can offer you the chance to ask questions, share with each other helpful ideas and generally find some more support for yourselves in assisting young people you care about.
We’ll respond to your questions and add some comments and resources as well.
We have a range of mental health professionals in our session today. My name is Mich and I am a family therapist, and we have Rachael, Sam and Jo who are all mental health clinicians ready to respond to your comments and questions.
Sometimes it takes a bit of time for us to respond – so please hang in there. We try to give your questions some thought and hopefully make our responses useful to you.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:46 pm
eheadspaceMich: We also have joining us in this session by logging on, Sharene, (who will be identified as ‘ShareneFAF’) who is a member of our headspace Family and Friends Advisory Committee. She’ll be sharing a little bit about her experiences and adding some comments as a parent with young people who have had some mental health challenges. Welcome Sharene. We really appreciate you being part of the session today.
And we hope to have a member of our national youth reference group joining us today. Welcome and thanks for joining us!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:46 pm
eheadspaceMich: A couple of things before you start chatting
• When you submit your question it won't appear straight away
• Our team will be busy reading and preparing an answer to your question before it is posted live - we appreciate your patience
• If we can't publish anything we'll let you know
• It also helps if you use a name (even if it's not your own!) so if you have a follow up questions we know who we're talking to. Also, if you don’t use a name all your responses come in from ‘Guest’ so that can be confusing for us!
Thanks in advance to everyone participating : )
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:47 pm
eheadspaceMich: And just to say, don't worry if you feel this is moving on too quickly for you to read everything! It will all be available on our website from this page from later today or tomorrow. This content stays on our website for quite a while too....
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:47 pm
Rachael Eheadspace: Hello everyone :)
My name is Rachael and I look forward to journeying with you all today.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:47 pm
Sam eheadspace: Hi everyone - my name is Sam. I'm one of the clinicians. Looking forward to chatting with you :)
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:48 pm
eheadspaceMich: Parenting is a big challenge – perhaps the biggest we will undertake in life!
Even when we’re really well read and thoughtful, many things that happen with our children and adolescents will be things we’re don’t feel entirely prepared for. Their development won’t necessary follow a simple timeline that applies to everyone. Some young people begin puberty much earlier than we expect. And all children and young people have their own individual characteristics, needs and experiences that make parenting them definitely not a one-size fits all task.
And we as parents may be the adults, but we also bring our own experiences of childhood, adolescence, adulthood, our personal characteristics, skills and needs. Our own children are not automatically easy for us to understand. At the simplest level, you may have a child whose personality is very different to your own, and you may struggle to understand the best way to support them because of that. And other factors can make this even more challenging a task.
We hope to offer you some ideas to consider, resources, supportive chat and replies to questions and comments today.
We will also be asking for your feedback later in the session so please stay tuned.
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:48 pm
Comment From Sharene FAF
Hi all hoping I can be of some help today :)
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:48 pm
Rachael Eheadspace: Hi Sharene, Welcome :)
I am glad you could join us today.
Is there anything that stands out for you in relation to setting boundaries with young people from your experience?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:48 pm
eheadspaceMich: And while everyone is sending in questions and comments here are a couple of important point:
• Even with the best will and skills on our part, some young people have more difficult to manage problems. Although we are presenting a lot of resources for you in this session that we hope will be helpful, if you have tried everything or feel stuck in any way, we encourage you to get more individual support where you can explore in some detail the situation.
• Skills are important and can make a big difference in situations. However if for some reason you’re not safe, you need to get extra help and support.
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:48 pm
Comment From Iona
My daughter and I are having shouting matches a lot these days. It doesn’t seem to matter what I say, she reacts to it. I wouldn’t mind in some ways, but she really seems unhappy and I’m worrying about her.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:48 pm
Jo eheadspace: Hi Iona and welcome…I’m sorry to hear that there are difficulties with communicating with your daughter and it’s great that you’ve visited this group chat today.
It’s not clear how old she is, or how long this has been happening and from what you’re saying it sounds like the first step is for you to find a different way of responding when she is angry. It can be difficult not to respond to anger with anger and learning how to be calmer in the face of conflict is the first step. If you can model this calmness, this in turn will help her act differently and hopefully diffuse the situation. This link has some good tips: http://www.strongbonds.jss....
Awareness of what is happening for you in situations of conflict with your daughter will allow you to maintain calmness. If you think the conversation is going in an unhelpful direction try to divert it by planning to talk at different times and places when you will both be more relaxed. Keep in mind that young people being sensitive to their parents is not always a sign of a bad relationship – it can sometimes mean that they are very affected by you and can tell how you’re feeling and don’t know what to do. We can’t know if that’s the case with your daughter of course….it’s something to keep in mind though. If this is the case, you might make more progress by beginning with the fact that you love and care for her and that you’re concerned she seems unhappy, and ask her what kinds of things she might find helpful. She may or may not respond to this offer of course. For many of us, some feelings are easier to admit to than others. For example your daughter sounds unhappy as you say, but she might be finding those feelings the most difficult of all. Being angry and irritable is what she’s showing, but other feelings may be at play. You sound very aware of this, Iona. If you can take steps to react less and keep calmer you may be able to really help your daughter with the concerns she has.
And don’t forget to look after yourself. It’s hard to manage stress without support and if you need some help with that don’t hold back – reach out.
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:49 pm
Comment From NarajahYNRG
Hi, I'm Naraja from hYNRG and I'm a young person!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:49 pm
eheadspaceMich: Hi and thanks very much for joining us today Naraja : )
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:49 pm
eheadspaceMich: Hi everyone, it would be helpful if you're happy to put a name when you send a question or comment so we don't muddled about who we're responding to. Thanks! Otherwise you all come in as 'guest' : )
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:49 pm
Comment From Sharene FAF
Patience (lots of it!) I have two young adult daughters now of two totally different personalities - I have had to learn how to set expectations and still learning! It's a win when I can get through a difficult conversation with my youngest, without it it going pear shaped but I am still learning. One useful tool is I am clear that I too am far from perfect and when we start not listening to each other it's sometime best to take a breath calm down but make sure we do come back to the subject
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:50 pm
Comment From Sharene FAF
and I have found it useful for both of us to recognise that sometimes the way we speak and react has actually become a habit that we need to break - we don't actually listed but hear what we expect to hear.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:50 pm
eheadspaceMich: Thanks Sharene. Great point about patience! It's not easy but important, isn't it?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:50 pm
eheadspaceMich: The following are some considerations and factors that can affect parents and parenting, boundary setting and more. They are not in a particular order.
Sorry it's a bit of a long list! But as we said, you'll all be able to read this content at your leisure after the session as well.
• Behaviour and mental health – behaviour and mental health can sometimes be viewed as separate issues, when in reality they are strongly interconnected. Some young people demonstrate difficult behaviour which can be seen as mainly about defiance, lack of motivation, being difficult when it could be much more. And conversely, young people may be quiet and compliant but directing their mental health difficulties inward.
• Developmental issues – keep stage and maturity in mind. There is increasing evidence that brain development is continuing well into the 20’s and for young males this can be as late as 30. Not only is the brain developing in this way, but the changes and transitions young people need to negotiate over the 12- 25 year age range also has a big influence.
• Attachment issues – When we use the word attachment, we are referring to the strength or bond of a relationship. A positive and strong attachment to a caregiver is a key factor in human development and is a protective factor that can help a person weather difficult times. Many things can influence relationships, but if your relationship with your young person is struggling, the strength of the attachment bond or the possibility of factors that have impacted on this can be a significant factor to consider.
• Skills that can help. Why might skills be important for parents? There are some skills that can help you manage in an emotional situation. When you learn and practice these skills you are also teaching them. Young people do model themselves on others so consider your role as a teacher here. Practice learning to calm yourself, reflective listening, showing understanding of another’s point of view, negotiation, assertiveness, problem-solving, de-escalating conflict. We have resources to post that will hopefully be helpful later in the session. If you need help with this we will be also posting some support service information later.
• Teaching responsibility – and also later we will post some content on specific skills for boundaries and consequences.
• Self-Care. Parents are often time-poor, stressed, with less support than they would like or need and self-care suffers. Especially when we’re worried about our young person, we tend to forget about our needs. Our own needs are not less important though. If we are unwell or not managing this will affect us personally and also those around us.
• Self-awareness. It can be very easy as parents who are busy and stressed to not recognise the factors we ourselves might contribute to a situation. For example, if we are really stressed, very busy with little time, anxious, angry, our young people will feel this and may react to the emotional ‘climate’.
• What you can and can’t influence – it’s hard to have control now with social media. This generation is dealing with a new set of online issues. See the Internet as the ‘door to the house’ and part of your responsibility. But you can’t solve this on your own! Work with other parents, your school and get advice.
• Different family types and styles. Boundaries can be more complicated with blended families but still need attention. Consider getting extra help if things are difficult.
• When to get help – We all need help at times. Being willing to get help when you need it is a sign of maturity. We mention a few scenarios where you might need extra help a little later in this session.
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:50 pm
Comment From Sharene FAF
It sure is!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:50 pm
eheadspaceMich: Where did you get your patience from, Sharene, if you don't mind me asking?
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:50 pm
Comment From Dave
I have a 14yo son that lets everything build up inside until he gets a point where it gets too much and he runs off to cool down. We normally give him some time then call him to see if he is calm enough to come home. But recently he has also been threatening self harm - we aren't sure if he is saying that just to get attention. He has been seeing a counsellor, but as parents how should we be handling this situation
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:51 pm
Sam eheadspace: Hi Dave – it sounds like you and your son are going through some challenging times and that you’re doing a great job supporting him. Good on you for getting him some support. I can see how you might think that your son is looking for some attention right now – I am wondering you might be right here? If all behaviour is communication, then I wonder what it is that your son might be trying to say to you? And I also wonder what your son’s counsellor thinks about what is going on? It might be worth asking for a family meeting with your son, his counsellor, and you. Hopefully by doing this you can get to the bottom of what is happening for your son, and what it is that he needs from you right now.
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:51 pm
Comment From Dana
Hi im lost with setting boundaries for my child. She is constantly being grounded due to her behaviour. She has lost respect for me and her teachers. She is lost with her friends. She refuses to go to school most days. When she does go i get phone calls from school regarding her behaviour. Suspended three times in six weeks. She suffers from ptsd and anxiety..
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:51 pm
Comment From Sharene FAF
yoga these days (and sometimes Wine!)
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:51 pm
eheadspaceMich: And we try to post some images and other resources that might be helpful for you
Here is something on resilience. Applies to all of us!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:51 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:52 pm
Jo eheadspace: Hi Dana...thanks for coming past today and I'm sorry to hear what is going on with your daughter...it sounds like she's really struggling. There is a response coming through soon which is very similar to your situation from 'Guest' and thought we'd respond to both issues at the same time...stay posted!
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:52 pm
Comment From NarajahYNRG
Hi Dave, I think it's awesome your son has already found a way to cope! I think a family meeting with the school counselor is a great idea and maybe even making an appointment for him with his local GP to have a chat with them.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:52 pm
eheadspaceMich: Thanks Narajah,
Have you got any comments about things your parents or other parents might have done that has been helpful when you were struggling?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:52 pm
eheadspaceMich: Although this is about recovery, I think it could apply more generally to life - the journey is not often straight forward, is it?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:52 pm
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:52 pm
Comment From Sharene FAF
I have found it useful for both of my girls to have someone they can speak to other than me - counsellor, tutor, family friend - I find my eldest doesn't want to 'worry' me even though something is wrong - it was certainly a start to better conversations - took the pressure off I think
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:53 pm
Jo eheadspace: Great advice and wisdom Sharene as it's really important for young people (or all of us really!) to have several places to go to for support
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:53 pm
Comment From Jen
I think breathing exercise are so important to be used in the school curriculum. After lunch is a perfect time to let students wind down and prepare for an afternoon class.
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:53 pm
Comment From Sharene FAF
I love that recovery pic - oh so true!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:53 pm
Sam eheadspace: They all sound like great ideas Jen. Breathing, mindfulness and visualisations can be a really invaluable tool for young people who are distressed, anxious, stressed, or just need a moment to refocus in the classroom (their great for adults too  )It can be as easy as belly breathing, and as complex as guided visualisation about ‘my safe place.’
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:53 pm
Comment From Dana
Sorry a bit more... Im in a spot with her where ive being grounding her and it seems to be harsh. She is missing out on a social life with her friends she still has. Its a battle trying to help her
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:53 pm
Comment From NarajahYNRG
I found it helpful when my parents were able to take out some time of their day to have a chat, especially when I approached them as it usually meant that it was something important I needed to talk to them about
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:53 pm
Comment From NarajahYNRG
I also found it so beneficial to have my parents support in seeking further help and talking to professionals.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:54 pm
Jo eheadspace: Dana...about to post that response and in response to you comment on staying connected it's important that young people have access to social media or their phones as this is one of the main ways to stay in touch with friends. Something that is super important at this time of their developmental lives
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:54 pm
Comment From Dana
Thank you jo
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:54 pm
Comment From Guest
Hi i am lost as to how to deal with my child with where do u call it quits with punishing for her behaviour.. She has anxiety and ptsd. She refuses to go to school. She refuses to clean her room. She has lost respect for me and any adults who are trying to help her. She ohsconsistently
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:54 pm
Rachael Eheadspace: Hi Dana and Guest,
I hope you don't mind that I have put both of your questions together as you are experiencing similar issues with your young people.
It can be very difficult when our children become quite disrespectful and oppositional in behaviour regardless of our efforts.
Sometimes seeking professional input and school involvement to work out a parenting plan is the next best step.
Is your young person receiving counselling around their own distress and are you involved as their parent.
Hi Lin and welcome to our session today. It’s a hard position for many parents – in effect being in between your adolescent’s difficult behaviour, and the opinions of others about what to do and I hope we can assist you.
There can be many reasons young people change their behaviour, although you say your son has always been a bit challenging. I encourage you to check with the school to see how he is going there. There can be many school related issues including struggling with the work itself, not feeling motivated for the future, having pressure from friends to change behaviour etc. And if you and the school are able to work together maybe a little more that can also be helpful.
We are all creatures of habit so sometimes how and where and when we talk gets a fixed pattern feel about it. You might consider finding other times and places to talk to your son, plan more times where you can enjoy each other’s company and prepare for when to talk if you can. We’re all a little more likely to be available if we don’t feel ‘cornered’ into a conversation – though I’m not suggesting you corner him! Just that he might feel that way.
Consider involving other supportive adults that have a healthy relationship with your young person, including the school. Sometimes having a teacher or someone who they feel is a bit independent talking can be helpful.
There are resources for parents on drugs and alcohol and we’ll post some information later about those.
Getting some more support yourself and the chance to talk in some more detail might be helpful. Either through our service, eheadspace, parent line, or a parenting course or session through the school or local headspace centre for example. Courses can help in getting a bit of a parenting network can help provide a supportive network as well as good ideas.
The following link relating to managing aggression might be helpful.
Lastly strengthening the relationship with your young person that is outside of the conflict is a really good idea, as often the time together is tense. So doing something light and that you both previously enjoyed doing together.
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:54 pm
Comment From Marianne
My mother had personality problems and I’m beside myself with worry as my daughter seems to be behaving similarly. I don’t know how to parent her…I’m afraid of labelling her but I’m also finding it hard to be on the receiving end of her behaviour after having the same experience with my mother. I guess this question is about a number of issues…any ideas welcome!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:55 pm
Sam eheadspace: Hi Marianne - All your comments make so much sense! And it’s great that you’re being so thoughtful, but I do understand why you’re worried.
You don’t need a label to notice behaviours! Whatever the reasons for your daughter’s behaviour it’s reasonable to want some extra help and to find ways to improve things. And whatever the issues you will need some skills such as keeping calm, managing your own stresses, helping your daughter put names to feelings and learn strategies. We’re all human and it’s very natural to find some things more challenging than others.
You might like to consider an approach that can offer support to the whole family, like family therapy, or mediation where someone else helps keep the conversation and planning on track.
Support for you is really important too, Marianne. We really encourage you to get some extra help and support. Is there anyone else who can share some of the parenting challenges at the moment too? Sharing that if it’s possible can allow some time out which is important. Don’t be afraid to be overt with your daughter too….if the conversation is deteriorating, try to calmly suggest some de-stressing or fun and relaxing time and come back to the topic later. Not everyone appreciates that, but it’s a good strategy to help with cooling down and thinking and problem solving.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:55 pm
eheadspaceMich: As we said earlier, we alternate a bit between questions and responses and some material that we hope will be helpful. Here is some info on what helps make a relationship positive.
Five elements of a secure parent- or caregiver-adolescent attachment have been described in the literature (Schofield & Beek, 2009):
• availability - helping young people to trust;
• sensitivity - helping young people to manage feelings and behaviours;
• acceptance - building the self-esteem of the young person;
• co-operation - helping young people to feel effective; and
• family membership - helping young people belong.
*******“Importantly, parents often underestimated the level of support they actually provided to young adult children, which is highly valued by the young people themselves…. parents continue to be a vital presence in young people's lives.”
What does the research say helps?
• Improving communication skills;
• Promoting family-based problem solving;
• Promoting attachment.
• Lessening negative or critical interactions between parents and adolescents
• Building family resilience and hope and helping families manage depression and contain suicidal risk. (Carr, 2009; Larner, 2009)
Participant
Participant
22nd Aug, 4:55 pm
Comment From Rob
Our grandson lives with us and we have always had a pretty good relationship. Lately though he seems very down, moody, and he’s hard to get to go to school. He’s 16 so it’s a change from previously. We’re looking for some different ways to talk to him as the usual things aren’t working any more.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 4:55 pm
Jo eheadspace: Hi Rob and welcome to the chat today 
Parents and grandparents are often the first to notice when a young person is different to what they normally are and it’s great that you are wanting to support your grandson with whatever might be going on for him at the moment. I can also hear that you’ve got a good relationship with your grandson and, as you can imagine, this is a great foundation to start.
From what you’re saying it sounds like you and your grandson might be having some conflict about him getting to school and it might be helpful to speak to the school as to what information they might have and how they can support you in helping your grandson feel more connected socially and academically.
Check what’s going on at school for him, if you haven’t already. Explore possible friendship issues or bullying, problems with teachers, learning issues and career direction.
I’m sure you’re already doing this when you’re talking to your grandson, try to begin and end with clear statements of your love, support and concern. Be specific (without judgement or blame) and engage him with open ended questions about what you’re noticing, why you’re concerned and ask how you can help.
I hope that some of this is helpful, Rob, and your grandson can always come here for confidential support, if he needs another place to talk about what is going on.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:17 am
eheadspaceMich: Some general points about ways parents can assist their young person:
• Where possible let young people take responsibility for their choices so they have an opportunity to learn from experience (eg where the consequences won’t be dire)
• Reframe less extreme behaviours such as some risk taking, some rebellion and experimentation as normal adolescence. This does not mean minimising dangerous behaviours, but keeping things in perspective where possible
• Keep in mind that many factors (not just parents and parenting) can influence young people. Peers, School, individual characteristics, events outside family control are all important
• Abuse or disrespect is not ok. Fair boundaries are important. Working on keeping a good relationship is also key.
• Monitoring and supervising young people is important, though not always easy. Supervision can reduce the likelihood of a young person engaging in problem behaviours.
• Focus on your own behaviour and self-care. This is the only area you actually have control over.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:17 am
eheadspaceMich: And we always need to focus on our own self-care as parents!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:18 am
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:19 am
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:21 am
Comment From Sharene FAF
for Guest - I am so with you with cleaning the ruom and my husband struggles with her retreating to headphones and not communicating - it has taken alot of time and understanding but my eldest has gotten way better and explaining her feelings in the last few months- for her her anxiety (suffers anxiety & depression) is crippling and things like tidying her room actually make her feel more failure therefore more anxiety - we are once again coming up from a low place and she is volunteering at the high school - the bonus is she has such empathy for kids that are disillusioned and she has been offered a job doing one on one work with kids there - really is worth talking to your school as they may be able to help more than we think (i know we didn't ask!)
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:21 am
eheadspaceMich: Hi Sharene
thanks so much for sharing your experience and what you've learned with us all. And I can see why you liked that picture I loaded...things can go up and down quite often, can't they? We need to find a way to keep up our own energy to manage it.
If you have any other learnings that would be great
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:21 am
Comment From Guest
Hi There,
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:21 am
Rachael Eheadspace: Hi, welcome :) Glad you could join us.
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:22 am
Comment From NarajahYNRG
I think at times young peoples behavior etc... isn't a reflection of their lack of respect or love for you. It can be because they aren't in a good headspace or they aren't coping
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:22 am
eheadspaceMich: That's a great point. It is easy to take it personally, isn't it? When you're stressed and things are not going well but it's not necessarily intended as lack of respect.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:23 am
eheadspaceMich: The evidence shows that there are four key parental factors associated with increased risk for both depression and anxiety.
These can be changed!!
1. Less parental warmth
2. More inter-parental conflict
3. Over-involvement
4. More criticism or parent-teen conflict
And these factors are associated with increased risk for depression specifically:
1. Less autonomy granting
2. Less monitoring (parental knowledge of teen’s activities, whereabouts and friends)
• This might sound confusing, but it actually makes sense – young people needed gradual increased autonomy and responsibility (depending on maturity) but still need this within a supportive structure with parental monitoring.
• So, to turn this around to a positive message, wherever you can, work on managing conflict constructively (whether in your own relationship or with your young person), build warmth and supportiveness, encourage responsibility but still keep up your positive interest and involvement.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:23 am
eheadspaceMich: We're all responding to your questions and comments and we post your question just before our response. So if you're waiting, we haven't forgotten you!
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:23 am
Comment From Barat
My own parents were really tough on us kids and I’ve tried hard to be more understanding. But now I’m struggling when the very reasonable things I suggest just get flung back in my face by my two children – 12 and 14.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:24 am
Rachael Eheadspace: Parenting is not an easy thing, is it Barat? I’m really sorry to hear your two children are reacting in this way. What supports do you have in the family for your parenting approach Barat? All adults in a family will often have slightly different priorities and approaches which doesn’t necessarily matter, but if you’re working on one approach while someone else takes a very different line, it might be important to have some help together.
This tip sheet on disrespectful behaviour might be helpful for you to look at http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/disrespectful_behaviour_teenagers.html/context/1092
Given your children’s age, it is important to improve the situation soon so it’s great you decided to join our session today.
There can be many factors which influence how young people respond as we are all very individual personalities–Some factors could be the influence of peers, their own needs and challenges (for example school problems can spill over into home issues), so getting a better idea of the issues for your young people is probably important.
Keeping calm but firm boundaries as well as learning negotiation skills might be helpful for you.
There are a number of organisations that offer good parenting courses and sessions and I really encourage you to find one that can help you with your adolescents and to involve the other parent, if you are in a relationship. Given what you’ve said it would be important to get that support happening as soon as possible. Look out for resources later in the session.
Lastly, strengthening your relationship with your young person, positive engagement can help when you need to set boundaries. As nurturing and fostering the relationship strengthens understanding of each other and respect. Increases capacity to include your young person in deciding appropriate boundaries.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:24 am
eheadspaceMich: We’re going to post some material on an aspect of parenting called Emotion Coaching in a minute. Focussing on this kind of approach may seem surprising in a session about ‘boundaries’ with adolescents. However it is often easy to forget that the basic emotional warmth, trust and positivity of a relationship with a young person is the best foundation for parenting and setting boundaries.
• Think about your family or work place and the difference it makes if you respect and trust someone who is your boss or who has the right to make decisions that affect you.
• Think about when you were an adolescent – what things helped you accept boundaries from your parents or carers or other adults such as teachers?
• Think about times you resisted someone else’s boundaries when you were younger. What might have contributed to that? What might have helped you now you’re looking back, to accept the boundary?
• Getting inside the experience of someone else, such as your adolescent, can be key to learning the best way to approach things.
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:25 am
Comment From NarajahYNRG
The best thing I have found is to let whatever conversation/ argument cool off and come back to it later when you've both calmed down and can talk rationally. I also found arguments can be very triggering for the young person especially when they say things they don't mean because sometimes when we get angry or are extremely stressed it's like the filter between our brains and mouths disappear
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:25 am
Comment From Sharene FAF
Thanks Mich - as most would guess it can be a massive journey - ours has been 3 years in the making and at the beginning I though, right we know what it is we are treating it and we will be back on track shortly! It's been a much longer journey than that but we have all grown in different ways, but accepting that it is an up and down journey and adapting how we approach things makes us better people in the long term (I hope!) It's hard work but forums like this can help point you in a direction that you had not thought of before. You also might need to try 5 different avenues before you hit on the one that works - the other 4 will have given you building blocks through - and the Emotion Coaching is an awesome eyeopener on how you can help change happen by changing how you approach conversations etc
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:25 am
Comment From Sharene FAF
lol Narajah - exactly! (the filter disappears for parents too!)
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:25 am
Comment From michele
Hi, I have a 15 yr old daughter who has anxiety also fears of people, she has not been to school for 4 months we got her into on line school but she did not participate. She is seeing a psychologist but only speaks to him and me, I try to understand her but find it extremely hard as I have an other comittments and get sick often. I find night time is the worst as she's up all night sometimes walking the streets without my knowledge.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:26 am
Sam eheadspace: Hi Michelle – that sounds tough for both your daughter and for you. When a young person has anxiety sometimes it can be difficult to know how to best support them when they’re feeling so frightened about things and pulling away from life and from you. There are a couple of things that you can do here – one of them is to keep the communication open with your young person and make sure she knows that you are a safe person to talk to. Though she feels like she wants to hide away and avoid the things that cause her to feel anxious, its important to gently encourage her to face these situations in a slow, and planned way. Its only by practicing her calming strategies, and facing the things that make her feel anxious that she will learn that she can take control of her worries and learn to manage them. We call this ‘exposure.’ You might also like to check out one of eheadspace’s past group chat called ‘anxiety – how to help your young person for some more information. You can find that link here:
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:26 am
Sam eheadspace: Sorry Michelle - you can find the link here:
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:27 am
eheadspaceMich: What is Emotional Competence and Emotion coaching?
In recent years, researchers have begun to identify a number of central skills that assist people to respond to emotions (in themselves and others). They have found that these skills are associated with much better life outcomes. These skills are:
• understanding one’s own emotions. Being able to communicate how one feels
• understanding other people’s emotions and being able to identify and interact with others when one or both parties are emotional
• regulating one’s own emotions (including controlling, expressing and modulating emotion) in a culturally and situationally appropriate manner
• the ability to use emotion in one’s life in order to achieve one’s goals.
Children and young people need to learn that:
• there are social and cultural rules about displaying emotions
• one can experience different emotions at the same time, and
• as a result of interpreting other people emotions, one can begin to take others’ perspectives and become empathic
These aspects of emotional competence have been found to be related to children’s abilities to develop friendships, resolve conflict, learn at school by being able to focus and concentrate, and achieve their goals.
Stressful events in family life are unavoidable. But research is showing that emotional competence provides children with the flexibility to respond to stressful life events in a resilient way.
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:28 am
Comment From Rach
My daughter’s doctor has told us she has depression and has been self-harming, which is pretty worrying for us. However she doesn’t seem depressed, wants to go out all the time and only seems happy when she’s on line with friends. I’m not doubting what the doctor has said but we’re just not seeing her looking down at home. I’m beginning to wonder if it’s just a way of getting out of responsibilities she doesn’t like and getting her way when we try to set boundaries. What can we do?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:28 am
Sam eheadspace: Thanks for your question Rach. It’s actually something that is difficult for a lot of families.
We’re not sure how old your daughter is, and of course the older she is the more it would be expected for her to see her doctor on her own. However, she is living with you and it’s reasonable to ask for some feedback.
Consider talking to her – letting her know you understand and accept that most of the session is confidential but that you would like to get some feedback with her in the room. One way to possibly get her on board with this is to let her know you want to make sure how to help her and also how not to be unhelpful for her – which is so easy to do inadvertently.
About depression and how your daughter is behaving, it’s not easy to be definite in an online session today. But we can say that it’s not unusual for young people to be trying to ‘manage’ their low mood by socialising or other activities. Some people put a lot of effort into seeming happy, which can leave them even more depleted at other times. But without an assessment or information from the doctor these are only possible ideas. It’s also possible that your daughter is struggling in some situations more than others and it’s reasonable to ask for some more information.
You mention that she has self-harmed and it would be good to have some more information about that – in terms of what are protective factors for her, what is the safety plan etc.
It’s reasonable to still have expectations and boundaries, but it’s certainly hard to know how to set these and where without more information.
We’ll be posting some information about boundaries, but you might find it helpful to have some individual support with this – either through a parenting course or a parenting service
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:29 am
Comment From Sharene FAF
huge hugs Michele xx
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:29 am
eheadspaceMich: Parents have been found to influence children’s emotional competence through:
• the model they provide about expression and regulation of emotions
• their reactions to children’s emotions
• their discussion and coaching about emotions with their children
• the emotional contexts they put their children in
During the early years, children depend on parents to assist them to regulate their emotions. As they develop, parents teach them about emotions, and increasingly they begin to understand and then regulate their own emotions. Some parenting styles have been found to be most helpful in this regard.
Gottman et al. found that the way positive and negative emotions are managed and coached (a way of teaching children about emotions) by the parent was crucial. We all have theories about emotions which is shaped by our experiences in our family of origin and continues to be refined over our life, influences the beliefs and responses we have to our own and others’ emotions. For example, a parent who believes that anger is about loss of control and therefore suppresses angry emotions, may not be able to teach their child about optimal ways to understand and regulate anger, nor about how to resolve situations of conflict. It’s natural to have varied responses to emotions, but we can learn to be better able ourselves and to help our young people be better able to manage emotions.
Parents who supportively coached their young person’s emotional learning tended to be warmer towards them, were less critical of their young person’s emotions and behaviour, and were more likely to use teaching styles that structured and praised their young person’s attempts to resolve emotionally evoking situations. When parents were unable to tolerate their young person’s expression of emotions or could not teach their young person about their emotional experiences the young person had poorer emotion regulation skills.
The key aspects of Emotion Coaching identified by Gottman and colleagues were:
• being aware of young people’s emotions
• Viewing their display of emotions as a chance for intimacy and teaching
• helping them to name the emotions being experienced
• empathising and validating their emotions
• helping young people solve problems (and setting limits where appropriate)
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:30 am
eheadspaceMich: Following are some tips about how to set boundaries adapted from the Strong Bonds site: http://www.strongbonds.jss.org.au/handling/boundaries.html
What are boundaries?
• Boundaries are guidelines between people about behaviour and responsibilities
• Setting and keeping boundaries can be difficult with an adolescent.
• Learning skills in negotiation is important
• Boundaries should be clear, reasonable and consistent, with consequences for not respecting them.
• Make sure the boundary is enforceable. Think about what consequences you can have if it is not respected.
• Make sure the boundary you want to enforce is worthwhile. Try to listen to their request and see if you can find a middle ground.
• The best consequences of a boundary not being respected are the natural consequences of the behaviour.
• Try to notice and praise their efforts when they do the right thing. This is a really important point and is easy to forget!
Notice the behaviour you want to continue and try to affirm and acknowledge that first.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:30 am
eheadspaceMich:
Boundaries are often not spelt out. It is when problem behaviour arises that it becomes necessary to make them clear, and the consequences for breaking them, clearer.
Where there are two parents, it is common to have different views about boundaries, whatever the family background and type. Parents need to work together to find a reasonable and fair approach that they both can accept and enforce.
Examples of boundaries.
• How to treat other family members
• Going out - where, when, with whom and how often?
• Driving young people around or use of cars
• Knowing where young people are when they are out
• Having guests in the house
• Who pays for what?
• Sharing housework
• Use of telephones or internet
• Smoking or using drugs in the house
• Anti-social or illegal behaviour
What are good boundaries?
Good boundaries are fair and reasonable, and appropriate for the age and maturity of the young person. As young people mature, there can be more freedoms, but there should also be age-appropriate responsibilities.
If you have very little control, and your child's behaviour is fairly extreme, it is better to have only a few rules. Make these the most important ones, for example, safety of family members or no drugs in the house. Ensure that your young person clearly understands these rules and the reasons for them.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:30 am
eheadspaceMich: There is a lot more good content on boundaries and consequences on the site I mentioned and we'll be posting a lot of links and resources later.
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:31 am
Comment From Hopeful
My daughter is a emotional rollercoaster as I am sure many are. She has anxiety which she sees a counsellor for however she recently revealed she is sometimes suicidal - I directed her to Kids Helpline and they helped alot. She does not want to talk to her current counsellor about her suicidal thoughts. She goes to school without too much drama but always stating she is bored - She is changing schools soon. I just want to know as a parent what can I do to assist/support her without invading her privacy until she is ready to chat. We have lots of crying cuddling sessions without talk or pressure to talk.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:31 am
Jo eheadspace: Hi Hopeful and thanks for coming past today to talk about how to support your daughter. I can hear that she has some great supports in her life, mainly with you! Never underestimate the power of love, caring and cuddles. It sounds like she feels safe with you to open up and that's half the battle - keep doing what you're doing.
As for supporting her with changing schools the best thing you can do is let her have as much control over the situation as possible. What subjects she wants to study, how to get to school, what uniform or clothing to wear, study schedule etc. Keep letting her know that you are there for her and although you can't know what it's like for her individual experience you understand that anxiety is horrible and will do all you can to support her through it. Give her crisis numbers like Kidshelpline, lifeline and Suicide Call Back Service (their website has some great tips on talking to someone who is suicidal) and also give her hope that things will change and she wont always feel this way.
Hope that this is helpful and wish you and your daughter all the best with her recovery
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:31 am
eheadspaceMich:
If you're struggling after all these points to set boundaries consider the following:
• Has there been a break in trust with you and your young person? Are they able to let you know if they feel hurt, neglected, angry or some other uncomfortable emotion? These often underlying emotions and relationship ‘scars’ can be very hard to speak about but they can foster a hurt and resentful attitude and contribute to battles about boundaries. It is possible to repair relationships in many cases but it will need some extra attention. If this is the case for your young person keep in mind that relationship problems can happen for many reasons. You might have been doing your absolute best but things got in the way. Your adolescent feeling hurt or angry is not necessarily intended to hurt you in turn. Feelings that can’t be attended to, though, do tend to fester. Try not to be defensive, keep calm, show you care and want to improve the relationship and these things can help.
• In general try to see things from your adolescent’s point of view, and express that. This does not mean you have to agree to change your boundaries or lose any parental agency. But with anyone, feeling understood can be a profound experience which can shift the dynamics in relationships.
• Is the boundary fair? The older your young person the more they are likely to feel they should be involved in decisions.
• Can you give your young person some choice, even if you can’t agree on everything?
• Check HOW you are talking to your young person – not only what you say. It’s really hard to hear ourselves and we can get into habits of speech easily. Young people are more sensitive to the tone of voice, non-verbal signals and other communication factors than we might think. Ask someone neutral for feedback in how you communicate. If you’re tired, stressed etc. that can block good communication.
• Sometimes things have become stuck and hard to shift. Consider a mediation service sometimes called ‘Reconnect’ or ‘Adolescent and Family Mediation’. This kind of approach can help keep the conversation on the rails, give each person a fair hearing, help you all with new skills and help come up with agreed boundaries.
• Check how your young person is responding to teachers, other adults in the family or family friends. This can be hard for parents as sometimes a young person will have a positive relationship with someone other than a parent. However if you’re willing to consider your young person has other relationships and contexts and that you might learn from them it could be useful.
• Get individual support and help! Parenting is challenging. We’re all human and sometimes there are no easy answers, but support for you and time focussing on more constructive things for you can help.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:32 am
eheadspaceMich: Research shows: “Importantly, parents often underestimated the level of support they actually provided to young adult children, which is highly valued by the young people themselves…. parents continue to be a vital presence in young people's lives.”
What does the research say helps?
• Improving communication skills;
• Promoting family-based problem solving;
• Promoting attachment.
• Lessening negative or critical interactions between parents and adolescents
• Building family resilience and hope and helping families manage depression and contain suicidal risk. (Carr, 2009; Larner, 2009)
What do young people say about parents?
This video (or read the transcript) is interesting feedback from young people about their parents. http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/teens_parents_relationships_video.html/context/1197
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:32 am
Comment From Sharene FAF
I have been lucky that our daughter has wanted us involved - there have been things that she told her clinician and I have only found out about recently - but I have been very lucky her clinician involves us - she lives with us 7 days a week and was seeing them once a week, so lots of information and sessions involved giving us an understanding of what needed to happen to help her - tackling from that point may help in your young person wanting involve you in the treatment and to share more with you
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:32 am
eheadspaceMich: We are still working on responses and there's still time to send in your comment or question.
We'd appreciate your feedback about this session via this poll - that would help us in planning future sessions.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:33 am
What has been the most useful part of our session today for you?
Hearing from other parents
( 0% )
hearing from the youth perspective
( 0% )
responses to questions
( 0% )
links, resources and services
( 0% )
all of the above
( 100% )
I haven't found the session helpful today
( 0% )
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:33 am
eheadspaceMich: Tough love.
• Many parents contact us unsure and distressed about their young person, and often they have been told by friends or family to use ‘tough love’. What this might mean and how it can be helpful is not always clear, but parents often feel desperate and also sometimes judged by others when things are going badly with their young person.
• Many conflicts can tip into aggression or passivity – where people find it hard to keep reasonable boundaries in a calm manner. Getting help and support to manage conflict more effectively is likely to be a good idea.
• “Tough love”, as some describe it seems to include: good supportive parent peers offering clear and practical help, making sure consequences of behaviour are experienced by the young person, ensuring parent and family safety, keeping consistency and maintaining positive supportive relationship wherever possible.
• Any planning of a new approach needs to be considered carefully. No approach is ‘one size fits all’. If you are considering a change of approach, we encourage you to get good professional advice and take the time to learn about the approach and consider the pros and cons.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:38 am
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:38 am
Sam eheadspace: Having a daughter who has anxiety one of the things I notice is that when she is struggling it can be hard for her to say what is happening when she is upset. When this happens, what looks like belligerent behaviour is actually her trying to tell me that she is stressed, worried and upset. By giving her some options about different ways to tell me what is happening can be helpful. Things like feelings cards/ charts, writing me letters, drawing help her to articulate what is going on. Has anyone noticied any strategies that help their young people?
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:39 am
Comment From Sue
Friends of ours have told us that their 17 year old daughter has left home because they told her she had to participate more in the family. They are in shock and don’t know what to do next. We’d like to support them but don’t know what to suggest.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:39 am
Rachael Eheadspace: That sounds really difficult for all of them, Sue and I hope our session today is helpful for you. They can read the session after the event too. Just go to this page in a few days and all of it should be available. https://www.eheadspace.org.au/get-help/past-live-info-sessions/
One service that is worth considering is something called a reconnect service, (or adolescent and family mediation) which is set up to help families with conflict and where there is a risk of a young person being homeless etc.
Your friends might also consider arranging family therapy. Maintaining an open invitation for their daughter to attend and be involved in. Most family therapists will see the whole family at some times and may also work with individuals as they deem necessary. Your friends could possibly begin by getting some help for themselves – given how much they are in shock and how difficult things are. Often we do need outside support to have difficult conversations and help with a bit of rebuilding of relationships.
We’ll be posting lots of resources a little later in this session so keep tuned. Another perspective that can be helpful is to keep in mind that in the long run, it is the relationship that matters with the young person more than whether or not they live with you, so keeping the focus on the relationship rather than whether the daughter is living with them or not will be important.
Your support for your friends is really important too. Many parents feel judged by others or worry that they will be judged, so a warm and supportive listening ear is probably really helpful for them.
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:42 am
Comment From Guest
Im sorry I am late
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:44 am
eheadspaceMich: welcome guest!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:44 am
eheadspaceMich: Living with young people
https://www.education.sa.gov.au/parenting-and-child-care/parenting/parenting-sa/parent-easy-guides/parenting-style-parent-easy-guide includes info on limits and boundaries and tip sheets on young people and parties, etc and link to encounter youth South Australia with party and other safety infohttps://www.encounteryouth.com.au/young-people-resources/
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:48 am
eheadspaceMich: Some parenting resources for specific issues:
These are just a few examples but there may be lots of other factors that can affect both a young person AND how you might parent.
• Borderline personality disorder https://www.bpdaustralia.org/family-guidelines/ This is quite a long and thorough article.
• Alcohol use and parenting/ depression and anxiety and parenting. Parenting Strategies http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/autism_spectrum_disorder_managing_behaviour.html
http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/alcohol_and_other_drugs.html - scroll down this page for a video on family rules and discussions about alcohol and other drugs.
• Young people with specific learning issues, such as problems with auditory processing, will need clearer communication and recognition of their needs http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/auditory_processing_disorder.html
Learning disabilities can be under-recognised. A young person with a learning disability can be very intelligent but struggle in particular areas. Don’t ignore any signs of learning issues. Be aware that as young people get older the issues associated with learning issues can in many cases actually increase and have a greater impact on mood and behaviour. Young people can find being always the one who struggles very frustrating. Intelligent adolescents who have specific learning issues can develop behaviour problems. http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/learning_disabilities_faqs.html
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:50 am
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:53 am
eheadspaceMich:
And some options for services and support
Parent lines around the country http://www.parentline.org.au/useful-information/interstate-parent-lines but we aware that some have different age ranges.
Grandparents and kinship carers online chat forum http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/forums_are_now_closed.html
Resources for grandparents and kinship carers http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/forums_are_now_closed.html
Search for “family support”, “parenting”, “adolescents and families”
Relationships Australia http://www.relationships.org.au/
Anglicare Australia http://www.anglicare.asn.au/
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:53 am
Comment From Guest
thank you :)
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:53 am
Rachael Eheadspace: Thank you all for joining us today and hope the content and shared reflection was useful.
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:55 am
Comment From Dana
Thank you to all... I feel like im just
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:55 am
Comment From Dana
Thank you to all. I feel like ive just started to lift the lid on pandoras box. Very helpful chat..
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:56 am
Comment From Guest
16 yr old son has anxiety but he wont consider seeing anyone, do you have any tips?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:56 am
eheadspaceMich: We’re about to finish the session today in a couple of minutes. Thanks everyone for participating and sharing your comments and questions.
And thanks especially to Sharene and Naharaja for joining us today and for being willing to share your insights and experience. It's much appreciated!
Our provisional date for our next Group Chat session for adults supporting young people will be: Thursday December 7th at midday ADST.
Look on our website and check social media for the details closer to the time, and we hope to chat to you then.
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:56 am
Comment From Sharene FAF
have good a week all xx
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:56 am
Sam eheadspace: Hi guest –this is something that we hear a bit. We’ve covered something similar to this in our past webchat called ‘what if a young person doesn’t want help.’ It can help to get some insight into why a young person doesn’t want to see someone – is it too confronting, too embarrassing, is it that they don’t see this as a big deal? The other thing you can do is to encourage your son to login to eheadspace for support online, that way a clinician can support him to work through his worries about engaging face to face services.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:57 am
Jo eheadspace: Thanks Dana...glad that it's been helpful and def get in touch for more personal support, if you think that might be helpful
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:57 am
Comment From Dana
Thanks jo
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:57 am
eheadspaceMich: Sorry, Narajah I spelt your name wrong!
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:57 am
Comment From Guest
he has also just started experimenting with marijuana
Participant
Participant
23rd Aug, 9:57 am
Comment From Guest
Thanks Sam, I doubt he will even consider that, but I appreciate that is a good option to consider
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:57 am
Sam eheadspace:
Thanks guest – as for your son’s marijuana use, your son can also chat to us online, send us an email, or call us and talk to us about what’s going on. If this is something that you would like to chat some more about, then I encourage you to login for a more lengthy chat with one of our clinicians.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 9:58 am
eheadspaceMich: Thanks again everyone and we're finishing our session today.
Bye from us all at the eheadspace Group Chat team : )
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
23rd Aug, 10:01 am