eheadspace Group Chat
Loading, please wait...
Group Chat
Helping a young person who has experienced sexual
April 6th 2017 @ 12am AEST
Many parents and other adults supporting young people have concerns about a young person who has experienced sexual assault but are unsure how to help them.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:51 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:52 pm
eheadspaceMich: Hi everyone and welcome to our Group Chat session today for parents and other adults supporting young people!
Today we hope we can offer you the chance to ask questions, share ideas and hopefully find some more support for yourselves in assisting young people you care about.
We’ll respond to your questions and add some comments and resources as well.
We have a range of mental health professionals in our session today. My name is Mich and I am a family therapist, and we have Jo and Cass, who are mental health clinicians ready to respond to your comments and questions. We also have Narelle and Ashleigh from Barwon Casa/Minerva with us today ready to respond as well. Thanks very much for joining our session!
Sometimes it takes a bit of time for us to respond – so please hang in there. We try to give your questions some thought and hopefully make our responses useful to you.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:52 pm
eheadspaceMich: A couple of things before you start chatting
• When you submit your question it won't appear straight away
• Our team will be busy reading and preparing an answer to your question before it is posted live - we appreciate your patience
• If we can't publish anything we'll let you know
• It also helps if you use a name (even if it's not your own!) so if you have a follow up questions we know who we're talking to. Also, if you don’t use a name all your responses come in from ‘Guest’ so that can be confusing for us!
Also, we know there is a lot to read in in these sessions, but if you miss something as it’s being posted live, you can check back later to this page: https://www.eheadspace.org.au/get-help/past-live-info-sessions/
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:52 pm
Cass eheadspace: Hi everyone, thanks for joining us today!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:53 pm
eheadspaceMich: Welcome Ash and Narelle and thanks so much for joining our session today!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:53 pm
eheadspaceMich: While we're responding to your questions I'll post some information for you. Ash and Narelle please feel free to add comments...
What is sexual assault?
CASA Forum defines sexual assault as any behaviour of a sexual nature that makes someone feel uncomfortable, frightened, intimidated or threatened. It is sexual behaviour that someone has not agreed to, where another person uses physical or emotional force against them. It can include anything from sexual harassment through to life threatening rape. Some of these acts are serious indictable crimes.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:53 pm
eheadspaceMich: And some key messages for you in supporting a young person who has experienced sexual assault
Some key messages for you in supporting a young person:
• Believe the person who discloses sexual assault or sexual abuse
• Do not minimise the abuse. Let the person know that abuse is unacceptable
• Give emotional and practical support
• Give the person time and space and don’t take it personally if their behaviour or mood has changed
• Make sure the person is safe now and help them make safety plans
• Don’t send the message that the person is to blame. The offender is responsible
• Reassure that there are often many and confusing responses to an assault, feelings can be intense. This is normal
• Get help and encourage the person to get help.
• Look after yourself.
• Ask before you touch. Many people who have experienced sexual assault will need to be given the choice about being touched, including sometimes supportive hugs. Think about the unwelcome nature of touch in a sexual assault and give the gift of respect and choice to your young person or friend.
• If the person is currently not safe and is vulnerable in some way (such as under 18, being assaulted by a family member etc.) encourage them to get help through a trusted adult and encourage contact with a service that works with sexual assault.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:53 pm
Jo eheadspace: Hi...my name's Jo and I'm a clinician here at eheadspace - welcome to the chat :)
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:53 pm
eheadspaceMich: And here is a good video link that you might find helpful too
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:53 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:56 pm
Jo eheadspace: Hi Maria…I’m so sorry to hear about your experience and that now your daughter was betrayed and abused by her uncle. It’s great that your daughter feels safe to have told you what happened which means she trusts you. Unfortunately, some parents have difficulty believing that this could happened in their family and that can make the young person’s healing more complicated. It’s great that you not only believe your daughter but want to advocate to get her support to move forward.
We will be posting information on a lot of services and what is available will depend on your area
I’m sorry too Maria that you also experienced abuse as a child and this may help you better understand what your daughter is going through. If it triggers unhealed wounds in any way, though I’d strongly recommend seeking your own psychological support.
In relation to your daughter’s uncle, it’s totally understandable that you’d be angry at him and it’s also important to make sure that he doesn’t have contact with your daughter again or other young people without supervision. Is there anyone else in your family who is aware of this situation? If you think that any other young people might be currently at risk from your uncle, it’s important to involve the police or a CASA.
I hope that some of this has been helpful Maria and thank you for logging on today to seek advice and support.
Take care of yourself and best wishes to you and your daughter!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
16th Apr, 5:20 pm
eheadspaceMich:
Safety planning and Immediate help
If you or someone you are supporting feel unsafe NOW it’s best to contact services as soon as possible. You can read this session after it’s finished so you won’t miss out on all the information.
If you, or someone you know, is in immediate danger, call 000 now
If you are Deaf, or have a hearing or speech impairment, and you need emergency services:
o TTY – dial 106
o Internet relay and ask for Triple Zero (000)
o Captioned relay – and ask for Triple Zero (000)
o SMS relay – text 0423 677 767
o Video relay – login to Skype & contact one of the NRS contact names, or
o Ordinary phone - dial 1800 555 727 and ask for Triple Zero (000).
National relay service
Safety planning:
Reporting sexual abuse:
Anonymously report sexual assault from anywhere in Australia
http://www.sara.org.au/ and information about this
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:59 pm
Jo eheadspace: Hi Priya. This sounds like a shocking experience your son has had and I’m really sorry to hear this. It’s not clear how you heard about this, but I assume your son told you about it, which is good. It sounds very hard though to be watching the impact on him and not sure how to help. I hope we can assist you!
Let your son know that it’s not ok how he has been treated. It’s an abuse of power and against the law. Whether or not he is gay it’s not ok to use that to humiliate or intimidate him
We have an online work and study service that might be able to help your son get back into work and support him – https://headspace.org.au/young-people/digital-work-and-study-program/
Here is some material about bullying from the Human Rights Commission.
This is the Worksafe VIC site but you can search for the relevant state guidelines http://www.worksafe.vic.gov.au
Your son can use our service www.eheadspace.org.au
Workplace health and safety legislation requires employers to ensure that workplaces are both physically and mentally healthy for all employees. This means steps must be taken to ensure that the working environment does not harm mental well-being or aggravate an existing condition.
People have a right to working conditions that do not cause a mental health condition or aggravate any existing mental health condition.
This is quite a bit of information to look through. Hopefully your son will find this material helpful, get the support he needs, and be able to get back to work in a safer environment soon.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:59 pm
eheadspaceMich: Feel free to send in your questions or comments!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:59 pm
eheadspaceMich: And here is a simple video about trauma
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:59 pm
eheadspaceMich: How can you help your young person with the impacts of sexual assault?
There can be a great variety in the impacts of sexual assault on a person and this will depend to some extent on the whole context of the assault, as well as the individual. The following are some common impacts with some ways to assist.
Ask your young person what they would find helpful, let them know you want to support them, let them know you’re learning too. And don’t forget to keep up your own self-care, fit in fun activities as much as possible and invite your young person to join you with these positive strategies.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 2:59 pm
eheadspaceMich: • Feeling to blame – people often feel ashamed after an assault or as if they have caused it. Reassure your young person that they are not to blame, that the responsibility is the offenders. Whatever you did or didn’t do at the time to get through the assault, you are not to blame. As an adult supporting a young person in this situation, make sure your attitudes are not blaming or doubting of your young person.
• Feeling anxious or panicky – Many survivors of sexual assault experience anxiety and panic. As well as anxious thoughts, the experience of anxiety can be quite intense, with strong physical symptoms such as faintness, dizziness, shortness of breath, shaking, tight throat, feeling ill, sweating, racing heart, etc. You can encourage your young person to remember that these feelings do not mean they are unsafe now (and if they are unsafe now, you need to act!), that they can help by practicing slower breathing, talking to themselves reassuringly, noticing the present and specific things in their environment that remind them of this, doing relaxation and calming activities, etc. You can use each sense in this way. For example – look at the trees across the road or something you find enjoyable and relaxing, smell the flowers or a perfume you enjoy, etc. (see a little later in our session where we will post some links to apps that can help, such as smiling mind, my calm breath etc)
These are a common experience of survivors of all kinds of traumatic events. This link has a range of strategies for preparing for and responding at the time if your young person is having this experience. Working on calming and relaxing strategies, sharing with a support person or professional, imagining a safe place, work on slow and steady breathing, re-write the story of the nightmare - are just some of the things that can help
• Grief, loss and sadness – a sexual assault is a traumatic event that can leave people feeling low, helpless, worthless and sad. There can be physical as well as emotional, behavioural and thinking changes. These are normal but if they continue for a while or they feel overwhelming to the person it is important to get help. Although we are used to people talking about grief and loss in regard to death, they can also apply to loss of trust, a feeling that life has changed, or a feeling that we have had a ‘near miss’ and come close to death. You can see how these might affect us after an event like a sexual assault. So, help your young person to realise these are normal reactions to such a difficult event, and that getting help is ok. We all need help at times, so it’s a sign of maturity to recognise when we need assistance. And remember that as their adult support, you can model good help seeking and support seeking behaviour too. Actions do speak louder than words.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:00 pm
Cass eheadspace: Hi Andrea, thanks for your comment. I’m really sorry to hear that your daughter has had to go through this. As parents we naturally want to be able to give good advice, the best thing you are doing is showing her you care for her and want to support her. A couple of months is not really a long time in terms of the impact of this experience for your daughter, but it’s good to try to notice if things are progressing or deteriorating as you’re doing.
There are many things that can affect how things go after a traumatic experience like this (including professional contact) so a little gentle exploring on your part might be a good idea. If you can ask without using the word ‘why’ that can sometimes work better, as people tend to feel defensive when asked a question beginning with ‘why’. Let your daughter know that there are individual differences, different needs at different times, and professionals can vary, and that it sometimes takes a while to get the best help.
Do you have any idea how your daughter found it when she had professional help? You say she had some help but it sounds like that might have only been for a few weeks. Is that right? Were there any things about those sessions for your daughter that were difficult or unhelpful? This is not unusual but sometimes that prevents help continuing so it could be worth asking your daughter. Maybe your daughter needs help to explain to her worker what she needs, or the impact of the session or even to ask for another worker, for example. It’s reasonable to ask your daughter if you can have a little feedback from whoever she sees as to how you can assist her (and how to make sure you don’t make things harder for her).
Nightmares and sleep disturbances are pretty common after an experience like this, but there are things that can help. Keep in mind that the context for your daughter’s rape is also likely to be important. It’s very normal to have memories at times intrude or to have unexpected reminders have a big impact, but the more your daughter can share these with her professional and develop practical strategies the better. Grounding activities can be helpful if you have concerns, such as using the senses to re-orient our attention to the present and to safe and pleasurable things can be helpful. We’ll be posting resources later in the session so keep watching.
Thanks again for your comment. Look after yourselves!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:00 pm
eheadspaceMich: Thanks Ash and Narelle. I guess that also depends on how they feel listened to and supported? What do you find helps people to talk to you?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:00 pm
Jo eheadspace: That's a great video Mich and also a good reminder that trauma symptoms can occur after someone has been sexually assaulted. There is a myth that 'time heals everything' although this is not the case for everyone.
If someone is experiencing ongoing distress, anxiety, hypervigilance and memories of the assault then it would be helpful for the young person to get some professional help.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:00 pm
Thanks Ash & Narelle...just to clarify, CASA is Victorian based? Could you recommend some other similar services in other states perhaps?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:02 pm
eheadspaceMich: Although we're talking about the impacts of sexual assault, it's good to know that there are some efforts going into prevention as well. Here is some info about school and uni programs, though you might need to check out what's happening in your state as this might vary
One example of a program focussing on prevention: Sexual Assault Prevention Program for Secondary Schools. SAPPSS.
“Respect. Now. Always” – a University initiative
This next site compares University residences according to which ones provide training to prevent sexual assault: https://www.fairagenda.org/residences_survey
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:02 pm
eheadspaceMich: Some more tips
• Your self-care, the way you cope with challenges and general wellbeing can have a big impact on a young person, so look after yourself!
• Young people react in varied ways to trauma. Sometimes the way they react can seem difficult or be frustrating for you. They might be angry, less compliant and harder to reason with – among other things. Try to focus on their needs that are being indirectly expressed in their behaviour. Keep your tone of voice as calm as possible, plan extra time to listen and support them, plan help if they need it but avoid comments that might seem blaming of them. As much as possible help them to put any thoughts or feelings into words. (if not with you, with a trusted adult, counsellor or write a diary). Try to plan relaxing and enjoyable activities more than usually.
• If you are still concerned and things are not improving, seek extra help. This might be through their school, your local doctor or a specialist service like a Centre Against Sexual Assault or local agency.
What to expect if your young person sees a professional
• A GP can arrange a referral to a professional who works in a private practice or with a service. They should be someone who is experienced at working with young people and have expertise in sexual assault counselling/trauma counselling.
• The professional should be willing to be checked out, to be transparent with how they work and to be careful about getting your young person’s permission for how they work.
• Usually the counsellor will begin with a thorough assessment of your young person’s behaviour and emotions and develop a good understanding of the event/s and wider context for your young person.
• The counsellor will also want to know how other family members are coping. The counsellor should explain the diagnosis and the treatment options available to you and your young person in words that you both understand, so that you are informed about how and why a treatment can work, and feel ready to participate in it.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:04 pm
Jo eheadspace: Thanks Julie for your question..hopeful some of this will help.
A few points to consider:
• Think about the example you are setting by your use of alcohol and other drugs
• Try to distinguish partying from safety if you can, in conversations with your daughter – you’re not necessarily against partying (if you’re not!) but you’re aware that many things influence safety
• See if your daughter will discuss risk minimising, specific ways to keep herself safe
• Let her know you would always rather she phoned at any time you to pick her up than to have her stay in any kind of risky situation (if you are willing to offer this!)
• Encourage her to plan with friends how they will back each other up if needed.
• Give her details of police, CASA, other services
• Give her links written for young people – we’ll be posting material later
• Try to keep building in positive contact and relaxing time with your daughter so that you’re not only talking about these issues. Keeping the lines open and trying to maintain positive contact are important. Sounds like this is what you’re working on!
• Is your daughter studying or working? Having goals for life and working towards them are protective.
• Are there any background issues that might have affected your daughter? Has she been bullied or abused in the past? Is she socially anxious and not sure how to feel relaxed without drinking or feeling she has to keep up with friends?
Gently exploring underlying factors like these could be helpful. If your daughter is dealing with any of these issues, you might encourage her to get help for those things.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:04 pm
eheadspaceMich: Keep sending in your questions everyone : )
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:04 pm
eheadspaceMich: While we're working on questions I'm going to post some self care pictures and material. We tend to mention these in all our Group Chat sessions, as it's so easy to forget about looking after ourselves as adults!
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:04 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:04 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:07 pm
eheadspaceMich: And some more self care material - might be good for you and your young person : )
• Self-care
Calm breathing – why does this help? Consciously changing the way you breathe appears to send a signal to the brain to adjust the parasympathetic branch of the nervous system, which can slow heart rate and digestion and promote feelings of calm as well as the sympathetic system, which controls the release of stress hormones like cortisol. When you use calm breathing or other practices to relax: Your metabolism decreases, your heart beats slower and your muscles relax, Your breathing becomes slower, Your blood pressure decreases, Your levels of nitric oxide are increased. All these things can have an important impact in the moment and over time too! So encouraging your young person to keep up all these good self-care practices, doing them yourself and maybe sometimes explaining why they help, are all important.
And some more self-care ideas and links:
• Eat well
• Exercise
• Muscle relaxation
• Imagination – using positive images (most meditation approaches use imagination. If it’s too hard to imagine something positive on your own, try a guided mediation like smiling mind, join a group, or work with supportive peers)
• Activity scheduling – this just means making sure you plan healthy, fun and relaxing activities in your day and week – it could include doing craft, exercise, meeting friends, walking on the beach, writing in your journal etc etc. The key is to plan these things so you don’t just rely on how you feel at any given moment.
Breath training from Melb Uni counselling service https://services.unimelb.edu.au/counsel/resources/audio/breath each exercise has an audio file to download. Male voice so may not suit everyone.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:07 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:11 pm
Cass eheadspace: Hi George, thanks for your comment. Your daughter unfortunately is not on her own with this – though as you can imagine there are often barriers to people reporting supervisors. Depending on which profession your daughter is studying for there will be different ways to make a complaint. I’ve included several links to relevant information and services below.
The starting point for you, though, is what you’re probably already doing – believing your daughter, showing her your support in emotional and practical ways and backing her up in her choices for the future.
I have included material on making complaints and your daughter’s rights, but as well as that, it might help your daughter to organise some counselling as well.
Letting your daughter know that this behaviour is not ok, but that it’s not rare, unfortunately, that you’ll help her in whatever way you can, that you believe her – are all important ways to support her. Showing your support in practical and emotional ways and backing up her choices are important first steps. Many people do find it helpful to hear from others who have experienced similar situations, so your daughter might be open to finding a supportive group at some stage. I’d suggest contacting your local service find out what they offer, and encourage your daughter to search too. How to develop a good ‘radar’ for risk and expand your strategies in different situations could be helpful for your daughter too and often just having the chance to talk things through before and after situations can be helpful. Your daughter was able to make a strong decision at the time – even though it has flow on effects that one can’t foresee. So just encouraging her to continue to use her skills, recognise her feelings and be able to talk about it and reflect on what happened will likely be helpful for her. Thanks again George, all the best to your daughter.
This is the link to Sexual Harassment material on the Australian Human Rights Commission site https://www.humanrights.gov.au/our-work/sex-discrimination/guides/sexual-harassment and this is the page that explains how complaints work https://www.humanrights.gov.au/complaint-information and this is about your rights (sex discrimination and sexual harassment) https://www.humanrights.gov.au/our-work/sex-discrimination/publications/know-your-rights-sex-discrimination-and-sexual-harassment
Your daughter could search for the code of ethics relevant to her profession (below are a couple of examples of material on sexual harassment) eg Legal sector https://www.liv.asn.au/Practice-Resources/Law-Institute-Journal/Archived-Issues/LIJ-September-2013/Addressing-sexual-harassment-in-the-workplace
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:11 pm
eheadspaceMich: And just to say again, don't worry if you feel this is moving on too quickly for you to read everything! It will all be available on our website from this page from later today or tomorrow. This content stays on our website for quite a while too....
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:11 pm
eheadspaceMich: And some material written especially for parents and carers
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
16th Apr, 5:25 pm
eheadspaceMich: Living your life and recovery
We’ve listed a few books below that are practical and focus on things that might help recovery. They are written for survivors and are in accessible language, with examples etc.
The body keeps the score
video and book
The great big distraction list, below. We all need a range of good strategies to try. If you can encourage your young person to make their your own list of what they find helpful, and include lots of options, that could be helpful.
This list will hopefully give you or your young person more ideas….http://www.recoveryourlife.com/index.php?categoryid=60&p2027_articleid=211
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:14 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:14 pm
eheadspaceMich: And I like this next image too....picks up that idea of the importance of our breath....
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:14 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:15 pm
Jo eheadspace: Hi Jan…I’m so sorry to hear about your son and it’s great that you are reaching out to find support for him. It’s a big shock to find out something like this so long after the event. Although you probably know that it can often take decades for this kind of thing to be shared and it sounds like your son trusts you in confiding what happened.
You have probably already told your son this, but some key messages for someone who has been abused in this situation is that the abuse is never their fault. Teachers have a trusted role and this is a clear abuse of power. It is up to your son, he may want to pursue this through the legal system and also make a formal complaint to the school. Again, it’s important not to force him into doing anything that he doesn’t feel comfortable with and the decision is ultimately his.
As you’ll see throughout our session today, being believed, supported, knowing that you are willing to play an active role (as much as requested) are all very important ways to help your son, which you sound like you’re already doing. Helping your son get some professional support is likely to be important.
Also it’s easy to forget that fitting in good self-care practices, doing fun things, learning to manage stress and distress could all make a big difference to your son. If you can model, encourage and offer to do shared activities with your son that could be a really positive thing for him and might keep both your minds on things you can actively do – as well as sometimes the needed work on the past experiences and current effects. We’ll be posting self-care tips and material, so look out for that.
Remember that you can still read our whole session online after it closes so don’t worry if you miss some of the content now. Best wishes to you and especially your son! https://www.childabuseroyalcommission.gov.au/
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:16 pm
Cass eheadspace: Hi Tom, thanks for writing in today. I imagine it was a shock to receive a call from the school. Although it’s not the kind of news parents like to receive, it’s a good thing that the school is acting promptly. There are legal consequences to sexting now around the country, but many young people don’t realise this. Often young people know about others that are doing the same thing which can make it seem normal to them, so your son getting a clear message about this soon is probably very important. Schools should not assume things about parents but they are likely to be asking you to support them, follow up with any professional support if they think your son needs it, and to affirm the seriousness with which they are taking this. The next steps will also be influenced by your son’s response. Does he acknowledge his actions? Is he otherwise doing well and getting on with peers or teachers, or is this issue part of a bigger picture?
If possible it might be helpful to have a support person with you in the meeting, like a partner or friend – if you feel you might get upset or angry. If you think you might need this I suggest you ask the school about that soon. Keeping the conversation calm and constructive on all sides will be important.
Be aware that schools are not able to tell you confidential details about other students. They should be able to tell you in general how they know about your son’s actions and maybe some general comments about the impact on others. They should not tell you who else they are speaking to or disclose private information about other students or parents. Understanding and respecting the limitations of what they can tell you and showing that you are both a support to your son and wanting any illegal or damaging behaviour to stop should all help make it a productive meeting. You can also consider talking to the school counsellor yourself or asking the school for recommendations for services. Maybe you would benefit from having someone to talk to separate from your son? All these recommendations are general of course, depending on the circumstances, the attitude and general picture about your son, the resources and knowledge of staff and your own approach. Thanks again Tom, hopefully this acts as some helpful preliminary information for you and your son.
Law Stuff information for young people about sexting Australia wide. http://www.lawstuff.org.au/nsw_law/topics/Sexting
This is about Victorian legislation in regard to sexting http://www.secasa.com.au/assets/Sexting/changes-to-sexting-laws-factsheet.pdf
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:21 pm
eheadspaceMich: And we don't want to forget some of the other behaviours that people experiencing, such as sexting
http://www.lawstuff.org.au/nsw_law/topics/Sexting re sexting for young people/Australia wide
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:21 pm
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:21 pm
eheadspaceMich: And also stalking can be hugely difficult and have a really big impact on people. Here are some links to services around the country that can help with stalking
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:21 pm
eheadspaceMich: We still have a little time to respond to more questions, so send them in soon
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:21 pm
Jo eheadspace: I think it's also important to remember that unfortunately sexual assault affects all people within our community and it's vital to have access to services.
Here is some great info for culturally diverse groups and the deaf community in relation to contacting 1800 RESPECT (National Sexual Assault Service) -
Using the 1800RESPECT telephone counselling service with a TIS interpreter
The 1800RESPECT Telephone Counselling Service is available to all people in Australia affected by sexual assault and domestic and family violence. Qualified and experienced counsellors provide counselling, information and assistance to access other services. It is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
The telephone TIS service is available 24 hours a day, sven days a week and is free of charge for anyone wanting to contact 1800RESPECT.
To arrange this:
Call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 and ask for an interpreter. The counsellor will make the arrangements, or
Call TIS on 131 450 and ask them to contact 1800RESPECT.
Translating and Interpreting service https://www.tisnational.gov.au/
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:21 pm
eheadspaceMich: It would also help to get your feedback on our Group Chat sessions.
Would you mind just quickly doing our live poll please?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:21 pm
What has been the most useful part of our session today for you?
Hearing from other parents
( 0% )
hearing from the youth perspective
( 0% )
responses to questions
( 40% )
links, resources and services
( 20% )
all of the above
( 40% )
I haven't found the session helpful today
( 0% )
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:23 pm
Cass eheadspace: Hi Barry, thanks for your comment. I’m really sorry to hear about your daughter’s recent experience at college. Your support, believing your daughter, being willing to learn and do what you can are all great messages you’ve sent your daughter. Many people disclose but don’t get the support they need at that point, so keep that in mind.
The context for events like this can be really important, though you don’t necessarily need to ask your daughter for all the details, if she is willing to get help. Just be aware that impacts can vary according to who has made this attempt, where, when and how, what they said or did etc. as well as the personality and history of the person affected. For many people the breach of trust is a huge shock, and of course if this person has some authority in the college that makes it more shocking. We can all feel very vulnerable when we feel powerless. So continuing to treat the incident seriously but calmly reiterating that support from a good service will be helpful are both key messages. You might also explain to your daughter that you want to help but that you’re not an expert yourself, so you might need some more support and knowledge in order to help her. It’s also important to ask if your daughter feels safe currently in the environment she is in. If she doesn’t feel safe it’s important to act soon either for her to move somewhere else or make changes and sometimes this requires outside authorities to be involved as well as organising individual support for the person affected.
You can let your daughter know that she can get confidential help and that this is available whether or not she takes things further to make a complaint etc. Often people do need some time and support for a while and then at a later point they might feel ready to make a complaint, or do whatever might be needed.
At the moment the best thing for your daughter is to give her the service details, offer to go with her or just take her there and wait, help with any other barriers there might be in her mind to getting help and give her your support (as you’re doing). You might also consider taking her to a GP though this is not meant to be instead of a good counselling service that is experienced in working with sexual assault. Thanks again Barry, wishing yourself and your daughter well.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:23 pm
Cass eheadspace: Hi Jane, thanks for your message. Check out Ash & Narelle's response to Guest at 12.51 PM, and let us know if you have any further questions.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:23 pm
eheadspaceMich: Hi everyone, we've had a few questions just come in, so we will extend our session for a little while longer. Usually sessions finish at 1pm but as we want to respond to your questions we'll keep going for about 5 minutes
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:23 pm
Cass eheadspace: Good point Jo. You can find links to relevant state based sexual assault services here; https://www.1800respect.org.au/help-and-support/telephone-and-online-counselling/
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:23 pm
eheadspaceMich: Have you all responded to the poll yet?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:23 pm
Jo eheadspace: Hi Brian...thanks for joining the chat :) We're extending it for a bit longer today...what would you like to ask our team?
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:25 pm
eheadspaceMich: We're nearly ready to finish our session
Thanks everyone for participating and sharing your comments and questions!
We hope it's been useful for you all : )
Our next Group Chat session for adults supporting young people will be: ‘Anxiety and how to help your young person. The provisional date for this one is Thursday 4th May at midday AEST.
Look on our website and check social media for the details closer to the time, and we hope to chat to you then.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:25 pm
Cass eheadspace: You're very welcome Abbie, glad to hear you've found the chat helpful today. Thanks everyone for joining us! :)
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
22nd Aug, 3:25 pm
eheadspaceMich: Thanks everyone and we're closing the session now.
Take care !
Emma eheadspace
Moderator
16th Apr, 5:30 pm
Message attachment
Emma eheadspace
Moderator
16th Apr, 5:30 pm
And why not encourage your young person to check out our Community Spaces ... great resources and group peer support available.
eheadspace Moderator
Moderator
16th Apr, 5:30 pm
Emma eheadspace
Moderator
16th Apr, 5:30 pm
Last Audit Date: 16/04/20