Your Questions Answered

Q.

It's coming up to the Anniversary of Black Saturday.
But I'm not sure what I am meant to do for my Best Friend.
She lost some of her family in the bushfires
She seems to be coping okay.
Sometimes it gets really hard.
I want to be really supportive, but I'm not sure what would be appropriate to do for her on 7.2.10

A.

It sounds like you are doing a great job looking after your friend. She has lost a lot in her life and you being around to give her hugs, and to listen to how she feels is really important. 

With the anniversary nearly here your friend might have some ideas about what she wants or feels she needs to do on the day, have you talked to her about it?  As you can see from our factsheet some people want to mark the anniversary, others don’t, so I guess this is an important starting point – does she want to do anything?   If your friend is a bit unsure, perhaps you could show her the factsheet for some more information about anniversaries. 

Whatever your friend decides to do why don’t you check to see if she would like you to come along or help in anyway.  You could also write her a note, send her a message, or give her something small to let her know you are thinking of her.  You know her really well so I am sure you will think of something that she would appreciate.

Your friend will probably have good and bad times for a while so just remember that being her friend and offering your support will be really help her recovery.  Don’t under estimate how important listening, hugging and caring for her can be.  And while she may not always feel like having fun, helping her to find things to enjoy will also be important.  The other thing to remember is that sometimes she will want some space and being a supportive friend is all about judging when to be around or not.